176. Why do I do this to myself?

Why do I get myself into
these situations,
Knowing full well they could
have been avoided?
Why do I do this to myself
When I know I could do better?
I keep taking on responsibilities,
And I know one day I'll crash -
But still, here I am, stuck on
something -
Something that could've been
prevented
I'm so confused
I can't think straight.
I don't know what to do.
My brain is already overloaded,
Now my mind will explode!
But how do I deal with it?
Fix it? Solve it?
Thinking of a situation stressed
me even more
Because I don't know what
I want.
I'm afraid of losing,
But I know I can't win.
Almost all hope is lost,
And the little bit left is
not strong enough
to comfort me
I'm in despair and I
feel so lost
My mind is running,
But the rest of me can't
keep up.
Why do these things happen
to me?
Really though -
Why do I do it to myself?